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Ever heard of anti-PD1?

July 2, 2013

Still got your big girl panties on, friends? I hope so, because you are going to need them.

I don’t know how else to say it but just to come right out and say it–I have progressed to stage IV melanoma. I had PET scans on Friday last week and follow up with the oncologist today. Since my last set of scans I have developed significant liver metastasis, some bone mets, and some more lymph nodes.

When Dr. S and Debbie, the nurse practitioner both came in the room, we knew the news was not going to be good. When I asked to see the scans and Dr. S told us he didn’t think it was a very good idea, I knew it was bad.

So there it is.

I am repeating my brain scans on Wednesday and having a liver biopsy as soon as it can get scheduled. A new drug study is opening on Wednesday and the study drugs are having some phenomenal results. I may be the first person to sign the consent.

That being said, we are not sitting down, we are not quitting, we are not giving up. Physically, I feel great. I am still working, eating well, working on getting stronger and still taking care of my babies. We aren’t going to change anything. We will keep moving forward. We will keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Back an eon ago when I was diagnosed, I wrote down the five things that I was most afraid of and re-wrote all of those fears into positive statements that I repeated over and over. Since my latest recurrence, I have been reading a book of healing scriptures daily. In the last six hours, I have been stripped down to the absolute elemental. I am repeating over and over “I will live and not die. I will live and not die. I will live and not die.” The truth is, I believe that. It is easy when I am not feeling any symptoms. I still FEEL like I am on the road to recovery. I will continue to walk this out.

Keep the faith,

12 Comments leave one →
  1. Hope Adams permalink
    July 2, 2013 3:06 am

    Praying for you Mareeka. There are no words to express my dismay at this DX, but our God is the God of healing and I fully believe your positive attitude will help.

  2. genna melone permalink
    July 2, 2013 4:12 am

    mike and i are going to stand in faith with you and everyday when i speak healing over your body i will make sure i end it with “you Will live, and not die” . this will be a battle you are Not fighting alone. just prepare your fields for rain(healing). please let me know if ya need anything to babysitting when you come into town or a coffee body at panera i can do both.

    • genna melone permalink
      July 2, 2013 4:13 am

      budy not body, that’s just weird.

  3. Mary Kirby permalink
    July 2, 2013 11:46 am

    Oh Mareeka, saddens me to hear this. Please know that my prayers are with you as you walk this out . ” …believe His word, trust His grace…”

  4. July 2, 2013 2:07 pm

    You are in our hearts and our prayers constantly. Love you, Little Sister!

  5. Mary permalink
    July 2, 2013 4:58 pm

    Tears come to my eyes.. and yet, I do know our God is good. Our God IS GOOD. Yes..He is… and I pray His goodness, grace, peace and mercy are available to you in WAVES. Love to you…

  6. July 3, 2013 2:03 am

    I am still believing God. He has given you a wonderful gift of writing. I reminded him of this tonight. I also reminded him that your children need you. Just know I am hanging in there for you and I will NOT GIVE UP. Love you and so grateful for being so kind to Frank.

  7. Elaine permalink
    July 3, 2013 2:42 am

    I am standing with you in faith. I believe in healing. It is possible! I love you my friend.

  8. Pat turner. permalink
    July 3, 2013 2:45 am

    I believe you will live to see your children grown and beyond! I am praying for you.

  9. Darlene Hunter permalink
    July 3, 2013 3:05 am

    I believe that with God all things are possible. May God bless you. Keep reading those healing scriptures.

  10. Leanne Friesen permalink
    July 6, 2013 2:29 am

    I am a friend of Andy’s. I will be holding you in prayer.

    • July 6, 2013 2:33 am


      Hannah and I have talked about you. Your prayers are truly appreciated.


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